HCG Weight Loss Plan - Gorge Day #2

Wow! Having to "gorge" for two days is brutal. Who knew?

Psychologically, I think this is good. I don't want to see another chocolate anything, another sweet anything, another fatty anything any time soon. On my worst binge day in my life, and I've had a few over the years, I never ate like I've eaten the last two days. Instructions are to "eat to capacity" the whole time for two days. That ain't easy. I've tried to eat what I normally love and save for treats but mostly I've had to force myself to eat all of it. The only thing I've actually enjoyed is my one-scoop ice cream cone of Baskin-Robbins' Pralines 'n Cream. I may have to top off my day today with another one. It will be the last one I'll have for a long, long time, maybe ever.

Last night I went to sleep about 1:15 a.m. and I got up several times but basically slept for about 10 hours. I'm used to closer to six hours of sleep a night. Believe it or not, I actually felt guilty when I finally dragged myself to the shower because I hadn't been eating for all those hours, other than a donut at 7 a.m. before I went back to bed. I felt half lethargic, half sick.

If I were reading this about anyone else, I'd say, "This is crazy. Why are you doing it?" Well, I've committed to this Beta HCG Weight Loss Plan, and this is part of it, so I will stick to the plan and reserve judgement for another week or so. I'll link to the site of the doctor whose plan I'm following after I have made my own determination of what I think of the plan. I am optimistic or else I wouldn't have committed to it.

When I lived in Manhattan, I went to the Atkins clinic and Dr. Atkins was my doctor. This was just before he was widely vindicated for his low-carb lifestyle plan. So I'm not intimidated or put off by the controversial or unconventional. I did well on the low-carb plan, by the way. The HCG plan is low-carb, too, just more extreme.

I know that the way I've been eating for many years is not good for my long-term health. It's also made me not just fat but obese. Not just obese but morbidly obese. The Bariatric Surgery Center of Highland Hospital, an affiliate of the Rochester Medical Center says, "An individual is considered morbidly obese if he or she is 100 pounds over his/her ideal body weight, has a BMI of 40 or more, or 35 or more and experiencing obesity-related health conditions, such as high blood pressure or diabetes." Yep, I qualify.

Like the frog in the water that doesn't feel the water slowly rise to a boil because it's so gradual, I can't imagine how I got this way. But I did. I can't imagine how horrified people who knew me 100 pounds ago would be if they could see me now. I've hidden out for many years, avoiding cameras, avoiding people I haven't seen for years, avoiding the truth about my weight. But now that I've gone through a hip replacement -- two years ago -- and arthroscopic knee surgery just two weeks ago, I am ready to tackle my weight and long-term health. Hence, this weight loss plan. Tomorrow it starts for real. And I am ready!

Maybe I'll get the video camera out that I've had for nearly two years and kept new in the box. Maybe I'll try doing a little video diary. If I do, I want to start it right away. I want to show the "before" and hope it's very different from an eventual "after."